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Green face

After decades of seeing sick and drunken customers’ faces turn green and then decorate their taxis with barf, Chicago cabbies have had enough. They’re asking the city to enact a law that future in-cab sickos must pay $50 for each throw-up incident.

If enacted, Chicago will be the first U.S. city to make sick boozers and bad-food eaters pay for their offensively messy offenses. We've nothing against hard-working hack drivers, but the Chicago ordinance should also require cabbies to take at least one bath a week and not drive to O’Hare Airport via Milwaukee.

 
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